I donned a pair of jeans, a stylish top, some lipstick. Memories of university romances danced in my head as I practised flirting in the mirror while holding a glass of wine.
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This became known as Plan A. Not only were all the patrons under 30, but the women were dressed in sexy outfits I would never wear. Predictably, no one noticed us except the bartender. While we were discussing our next move, music suddenly started blaring so loudly it killed the conversation.
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Our trio of not-wanting-to-be-cougars raced back to my place and my stockpile of red wine. It was 10 p.
Three-minute conversations are incredibly short. Once you've found out each other's professions and hobbies, likes and dislikes, it's already time to move on. There's barely enough time to jot down a name, let alone envision holding hands on a moonlit beach. At the end of the evening, the faces and conversations blurred together; not a single guy stood out as someone to see again. Meet a guy at a class or a sports league.
Meeting men through mutual friends was no longer possible, as none knew any single and dateable guys. So I joined a beach volleyball group. Sundays that summer became a joyous mix of sand, sun and beer. And I met someone. We dated for six weeks before I broke it off.
To me, that seemed equivalent to six months in single-and-fortysomething years. Encouraged by such a long relationship, I grew bolder.
Conversations with other singles netted valuable information about meeting mates online. I was amazed at how quickly and openly they broached the topic of Internet dating: Still, I was skeptical. At first, I scoured each profile and crafted individualized messages. About eight dates in, I got my groove and began to send more messages with fewer words. I started dating up a storm, sometimes two a night back to back.
The guys were entertaining, the restaurants nice, the conversations fun, but disappointingly there were no real sparks.
None turned out to be the optimistic, self-assured traveller I was looking for. My approach needed a change. Instead of a restaurant, perhaps an activity would give me more insight into his personality and possible shared interests.
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